September 14, 2005

Dear Mr. SUV,

I'm sorry that it now costs you $180.00 every time you need to fill your gas tank, but that's the consequence of your decision to buy that oversized off-road vehicle for your daily commute on the interstate.

Just like your attempt to improve your gas milage by accellerating from zero to sixty in 6.3 weeks has a consequence - the rest of us think you're an asshole.

And get the hell out of the fast lane if you won't do at least the speed limit. Owning that monster makes you special all right, but 'special' has taken on a whole new meaning.

Posted by Ted at September 14, 2005 06:06 AM | TrackBack
Category: Square Pegs

"Stop eating the paste" special?

Posted by: Rob@L&R at September 14, 2005 06:59 AM

Sorry Ted but I gotta disagree with ya on this one.The bigger and badder the better.My hot rods and monster trucks fall into the same class a my guns.I own them because I'm an American living in America and if I want one I'll damb well own it.I don't have to need it for any reason.Just wanting and desiring it is reason enough to own it.
Gas milage?Pollution?Like I said before if they where to legalize hemp production we would all be driving on methanol for about 10 cents a gallon.Anyone who's not lobbying their leaders for just that have no room to gripe.Other alt fuels are not out of the question either.
I do,however,agree with yer thoughts on the speed limit though.Don't get me started on that.One thing I despise are people who don't get the concept of Slow Traffic Keep Right or that the Left lane is the PASSING! lane.
Now as far as other peoples reasons for owning a monster truck I reckon there are many.People who own them for the reasons I stated above I can respect.People who are like me and have been raised around big,powerful machines all of their life and who consider them a part of their culture I respect.Believe it or not I was once considering buying a fully restored B-56 single axle Mack truck just to cruise around in.People who own them because they feel safer I am mixed about.On one hand you are overall and all other things being equal safer in a larger vehicle when in a crash with a smaller vehicle.But on the other hand perhaps some of those people are just too paranoid and should maybe just go to defensive driving school and then buy or borrow a set of nads and get over it.
This brings us to another breed of owner.These are the one's who own SUVs for the feeling of power that that they need to feel over others by driving something that allows them to look down at and to tower over others.There are many sub catagories of this driver.There's the "I drive a big vehicle because it draws attention from my small weiner"type.Then there's the mid life crisis type which is usually a guy.These are the types that often show up at our Mopar shows in their Vipers and try to impress us with their check writing prowess.Not!

Posted by: Russ at September 14, 2005 09:09 AM

It ain't a lot better these days, but if they'd get diesel engines, they wouldn't have to fill that huge tank very often... Course they wouldn't win the hole shot, but, I can tell you that my truck has plenty of get up and go... Not to mention it sounds like what a truck should sound like...
(and as a side benifit, I just love pulling up someplace fancy and offending all the rich people there with the noise and smell)

Posted by: Tim at September 14, 2005 09:30 AM

Russ, you misunderstood my point (partially anyway). I don't care that they own and drive these big-assed SUV's. I mind that now that gas costs have soared they've started driving like grannies in an effort to save gas. Be a turtle all you want, just do it in the rightmost lane.

And I hate the whining about gas prices. We're all paying it, from those who drive little matchbox cars to the monster truckers.

Posted by: Ted at September 14, 2005 10:20 AM

Don't worry Ted.I knew your point exactly.I just thought it was a good excuse to speak my mind on the subject as well as to throw in a good word for the ol' monster trucks.Woooo Hoooo!!!!!

Posted by: Russ at September 14, 2005 12:14 PM
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