To those who snickered when I mentioned that I program in COBOL on a mainframe computer, I offer up the following:
main.frame ( 'mAn-"frAm noun): An obsolete device still used by thousands of obsolete companies and government entities, serving billions of obsolete customers and obsolete constituents, making huge obsolete profits for obsolete shareholders, and this year's obsolete models run twice as fast as last year's.