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Of complete ass-hattery, that is. We have four, count 'em, four, fools from the world of sports who should just STFU. Of course, they have the right to an opinion, but the only difference between them and the loudmouth at the end of the bar is that nobody is sticking a microphone in the lush's face.
Leading off is columnist Tim Dahlberg, who has spent this entire season ripping on Barry Bonds for not playing. Of course, three knee surgeries and rehab are no excuse to this hack, he's got his schtick (Bash Bonds) and he's beating the dead horse as hard and as often as he can. If you follow the link, make sure you catch all of his oh-so-subtle steroid references. This fool hates baseball, pure and simple. It would be nice if he quit writing about it.
Up second, Milton Bradley of the Los Angeles Dodgers proves that the anger management counselling he received last year worked well. He never once raised his voice as he ripped into teammate Jeff Kent, calling him a racist. Personally, I think that his voice was muffled since his head was up his ass. Jeff Kent is not an easy guy to get along with, but to play the race card is just low and stupid.
Kent had the perfect response, "Ask Dusty Baker if I'm racist, Ask Dave Winfield and Joe Carter."
Bradley's problem is that he was promised by management that he would be the leader of the team, and he believes that all you need to do to be a leader is to be told that it's the way it will be. When Kent jumped him about not hustling during one baserunning play, Bradley fires back and displays his mad leadership skills. I'd call him a Dodger jackass, but that would be redundant.
And I didn't make a single board game joke.
And then there's Frank Robinson. I have a lot of respect for the man, which is why I choose to believe that reporters caught him at a bad time, like maybe he'd just finished snorting cocaine from a DC hooker's bellybutton.
I'd say "batting cleanup", but I'd rather use the bat on the skull of the director of the Tour de France. After yet another smear attack on Armstrong by the French newspaper L'Equipe (who do so regularly), Jean-Marie Leblanc has come out firmly on the side of science scientology. The newspaper printed copies of paperwork they claim proves that six year old urine samples belonged to the American cyclist.
Six year old urine sample? I guess the only question I have about the "proven scientific facts" is, tastes great or less filling?
He owes explanations to us and to everyone who follows the tour.
No, he owes you nothing. Armstrong has been repeatedly tested throughout his career and has never had anything but clean results. Now that he's retired and out of the country, French courage roars forth for one last cheap shot. It's telling that the other leading professional cyclists are all coming out in support of Lance Armstrong.
And until another American LeMond or Armstrong comes along to dominate, the Tour de France will drop back to the level of popularity enjoyed by Iron Man triathalons and Arena Football.
I suppose I should wrap this up somehow... ok, I've got it.
pftftftftftft!
Posted by Ted at August 24, 2005 06:44 PM | TrackBackDahlberg's an idiot who's puffy and flaccid and would strike out in slow-pitch.
Bradley should take his bat and glove, go home and play an assortment of his namesakes' board games with all his friend (namely himself).
Frank should be given a pass on his comments; coaching a dark-horse to possible post-season play should take priority and he's probably upset that a quiet hero like Palmeiro was cheating. He may have been good enough to put up the same numbers unassisted, but who knows??
As for the french and their western component, the democratic national committee, they choose to be and remain vast gaseous bags of fart...Please, anybody, light a match!!!
By the way Rocket Man, you are a master ranter!!
Thanks!